Just when you thought that we might be OK, London's Mail on Sunday came up with The 100 Celebs Who Really Matter and, like all of these lists, it's very subjective of course and since I don't have an idea who the author, Piers Morgan, even is (clearly not one of the "100" even though apparently he's a judge on America's Got Talent - excuse me while I scratch my head and remember that this show is even still on) I'll have to assume (perhaps incorrectly, who knows) that he has some thought in his head and some criteria for this list above and beyond shilling for the people he works for (although, let's look at the number one spot... hmmm Simon Cowell, isn't that his boss on AGT?? Shocker!).
I guess when I read the item on Nikki Finke today it wouldn't have much mattered except for the fact that this fellow put Robert Pattinson (the perpetually stoned looking star of the Twilight movies as well as the recent Remember Me movie with LOST's Emile de Ravin that most people forgot to go to) a notch ahead of Sir Paul McCartney. Ha! Well, Sir Paul certainly doesn't need me to defend him but I do find it hilarious that anyone would put this flash in the pan (uh, that would be Pattinson) ahead of anyone, especially Paul McCartney.
Who in five years will even remember that Pattinson was a 'star' except maybe a few 20-somethings who, after college, will be cleaning out their room at their mother's house and stumble across dog-earred copies of the Twilight books and a few issues of Tiger Beat with Pattinson on the cover. Call it the Bobby Sherman/David Cassidy/James Van Der Beek/Ryan Phillipe/ Syndrome (and I think I'm being generous to Van Der Beek). The answer to the Jeopardy question "Whatever happened to Robert Pattinson?" will be "Who??"
Sorry if that seems harsh but as I have recently passed the mid-point of my forties I have increasingly grown tired of Hollywood foisting talent-free young actors on us and trying really hard to tell us that they matter. Sure, they matter as human beings, but they are not in the same class as Paul McCartney.
Unfortunately because of the whims of cosmic jokes, that Taylor Lautner has already signed up for a couple multi-million dollar action flicks (including, dubiously, Stretch Armstrong) we may be stuck with him for a bit longer. God help us all.
